When Gloria Braas graduated from high school, she worked for the ration board during World War II because she wanted to help the war effort.
After the war, she eventually settled down and got married. “The two loved to cook and they loved cooking shows,” Gloria’s daughter Tammy Braas-Hill says. “They had a lovely marriage, a beautiful relationship. She and my dad were the love of each other’s lives.”
After her husband passed away, Gloria’s bond with her daughter only grew stronger. “It was just the two of us, and she wanted me to see everything and experience everything that she enjoyed,” Tammy says.
While Gloria had been used to living alone for years, age comes for everyone, and Tammy eventually noticed her mother wasn’t caring for herself as she used to. So she decided to move into Gloria’s home and care for her.
Things were okay for a while, if taxing on Tammy. But then her mother’s dementia got worse. “It got to the point where she was agitated and I couldn’t keep her calm, I couldn’t keep her comfortable,” she says. “It was hard.”
After consulting with her mother’s doctor, they determined that hospice was the answer. Tammy was put in contact with By the Bay Health.
“When By the Bay Health arrived and their wonderful saviors came with medication, that’s when things started to calm down,” Tammy says. “She was much more comfortable.”
Beyond helping manage Gloria’s diminishing cognitive abilities, By the Bay Health provided Tammy with relief. That’s part of what makes hospice and palliative care so powerful. End-of-life care has more than one patient, in that the family and other loved ones need care as well.
“When someone joins our program, we want to be there for them completely. The nurse is generally the first person to make contact, but they also have support of a spiritual chaplain and others for emotional support,” says Laura Hagman, MSW, a Hospice Social Worker at By the Bay Health.
“Caregiver burnout is something that’s so incredibly real,” she says, “not only for the person experiencing the burnout but the patient as well.
For Tammy, the holistic support of hospice care offered a chance to simply breathe. “As the family caregiver, there was a lot of holding things in,” she says. “Laura would let me get my frustrations out by just sitting and listening to me as a social worker.”
The nurse assigned to Gloria, Abby Thompson, RN, also had a big impact. “Abby is just a sweet woman, and she would get my mom to smile,” Tammy says.
For Abby, assisting Tammy and Gloria was an honor. “I would sit with Gloria and Tammy and we would just talk,” she says.
With her mother’s passing, Tammy is thankful for the support hospice care provided her. “It’s a journey,” she says, “and it’s a difficult one. But it can be made a lot easier with By the Bay Health.”
By the Bay Health is celebrating our 50th anniversary of advocating for hospice and palliative care. You can help us continue our mission by donating. Visit our 50th anniversary page to learn how you can contribute.
